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Topic: NFL mid-season report card! Post Reply | Post New Topic
Kevin Hagerman
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Joined: 15 April 2005
Location: United States
Posts: 17216
Posted: 30 October 2017 at 5:27am | IP Logged | 1 post reply

Here's my take on the AFC.  Will be back later to tackle the NFC.

AFC East

  • New England Patriots (5-2) – This is probably Bill Belichick's worst squad. They might not even win the Super Bowl.

  • Buffalo Bills (4-2) – At least the Pats might have a division rival now. We'll know when they have their showdowns(!) in weeks 13 and 16.

  • Miami Dolphins (4-3) – Pretty much where I expected them to be: mediocre.

  • New York Jets (3-4) – These guys were supposed to be worse than Cleveland!

AFC North

  • Pittsburgh Steelers (5-2) – Pretty much the record I expected although not the games I expected. Pittsburgh's ability to lose to anyone and beat anyone not based in Foxboro continues. Roethlisberger is pretty much done, though, and I don't know why. Several embarrassing passes last night. Defense is content to give up tons of yardage but tighten way the hell up in the red zone.

  • Baltimore Ravens (404) – These guys. Their Super Bowl is likely going to be the next Steelers game week 14 at Heinz.

  • Cincinnati Bengals (2-4) – I'm a Steelers fan, but I'm also an AFC North fan, and Early this season I wanted to go to Cincy and grab each player by the shoulders and shake them and yell “Preseason has ended! This is all real

  • Cleveland Browns (0-7) – These fuckin' guys.

AFC South

  • Tennessee Titans (4-3) – Consider: Someone from this division has to make the playoffs. If they were held today it would be Tennessee.

  • Jacksonville Jaguars (4-3) – Jacksonville was impressive versus Pittsburgh and Baltimore, until Baltimore revealed itself. But still. If they can put it together for the road rematch in week 17, they might be in the postseason. Or they may be the division leader outright by then. Or Tennessee might coast. Who knows?

  • Houston Texans (3-3) – Holding it together after losing defensive star JJ Watt, thanks to their spectacular rookie QB. Fans will look back and say “What could have been?” Next season might be amazing.

  • Indianapolis Colts (2-5) – Very disappointing. Coach Pagano's incredible leukemia story won't save his job in the pitiless NFL. But if they can get Luck on the field and battle back from this, maybe he can Monte Clark it for another year.

AFC West

  • Kansas City Chiefs (5-2) – Chiefs fans probably aren't so surprised, but I think the rest of the league was. KC just quietly racks up wins. Of course, their two game losing streak has taken a bit of the luster off.

  • Denver Broncos (3-3) – I don't know why I thought they'd be better; I can't even recall the QB's name.

  • Los Angeles Chargers (3-4) – SO GLAD these carpetbaggers are sucking it hard this year. I hope their new fan base screws them as hard as they screwed their old fan base. Fuck the Chargers.

  • Oakland Raiders (3-4) – That can't be right. Oakland would have to win out to match last year's record (although they are on a pace to match 2015's 7-9). Biggest disappointment in the AFC, edging out Baltimore only because Baltimore didn't win their division last year.

Edited by Kevin Hagerman on 30 October 2017 at 6:07am
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Kevin Brown
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Joined: 31 May 2005
Location: United States
Posts: 7666
Posted: 30 October 2017 at 6:11am | IP Logged | 2 post reply

Other than the fact that the officiating really sucks this year????  (Zach Miller still scored a TD, refs!)

Bad teams have gotten better (Eagles & Rams) through coaching changes and good drafts, bad teams (Browns) remain the same, some teams still get the benefit of the call more often than not (Patriots) and at least one owner (though I suspect he's not alone) equates the players to "inmates".

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Kevin Hagerman
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Joined: 15 April 2005
Location: United States
Posts: 17216
Posted: 30 October 2017 at 11:50pm | IP Logged | 3 post reply


NFC East

  • Philadelphia Eagles (5-1) – The cream of the NFC? They seem built to get ahead and stay ahead. And with their running D, coming from behind isn't off the table either.

  • Dallas Cowboys (3-3) – Offensive line is coming together, just in time for them to lose their running back to suspension. However, f they can keep pace with the Eagles and beat them twice head-to-head, they could recapture the division. Week 17 might be a thriller.

  • Washington Redskins (3-3) – Probably the worst 3-3 team. Just can't gel. But hey, at least they aren't...

  • New York Giants (1-6) – How far the mighty have fallen. The Giants average a dismal 16 points per game. Their sole victory came after losing their star receiver; go figure.

NFC North (My favorite NFC division!)

  • Minnesota Vikings (6-2) – Pittsburgh got lucky against these guys I think. They are playing gutsy football, relying on their bench to put it together. However: they have a road-heavy back stretch. If they sweep the remaining black-and-blue division games, they may be in the postseason.

  • Green Bay Packers (4-3) – No Aaron Rodgers, no chance? I think it's not that cut-and-dried. Their coach is going to have to put together some wins, though, and it's all uphill. Their points scored/points allowed are both 23. That's not good.

  • Detroit Lions (3-4) – Well, they kept Stafford upright for nearly all of the Steelers game. Lions receivers need that YAC juice to avoid getting mired in the red zone like they did.

  • Chicago Bears (3-5) – Bears are relegated to the spoiler role by this point. Nothing would please them more than to beat up on their rivals in the four head-to-head games they have left.

NFC South

  • New Orleans Saint (5-2) – Can't draw a bead on this team. If I'd had to guess I would have put their record at 3-4. They had to battle back against the Rodgers-less Pack last week (QB Brett Hundley – 87 passing yards). Puzzling.

  • Carolina Panthers (5-3) – I don't know what to say about this team. They beat New England on the road, and lost to Chicago. They can make their own destiny, especially if they win that December 3rd Saints game.

  • Atlanta Falcons (4-3) – Disappointment of the season? They seem suddenly toothless. SB hangover? Maybe, but recall in 2015 they were 8-8. They may be orbiting their True Selves right now.

  • Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-5) – Last season's 9-7 seems so long ago now. I have picked the Bucs to win 4 times this season. *shiver*

NFC West

  • Los Angeles Rams (5-2) – Rams can be explosive and may be benefitting from a lack of scrutiny. Key games may be Philadelphia December 10th and Seattle on the road a week later.

  • Seattle Seahawks (5-2) – How about that Houston game? I had no clue it was going to be a shootout. Seattle also has an Eagles game looming. Lotsa doin's afoot in the NFC!

  • Arizona Cardinals (3-4) – So disappointing. I was really hoping Arians (who I thought was gonna get the Steelers coaching job) would make a name for himself here.

  • San Francisco 49ers (0-8) – Is Jim Harbaugh still an asshole? BECAUSE NO ONE CARES.

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Brian Floyd
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Joined: 07 July 2006
Location: United States
Posts: 6164
Posted: 02 November 2017 at 7:49pm | IP Logged | 4 post reply

Deshaun Watson is likely done for the year, and Andrew Luck definitely is. Luck being out could lead to the already garbage Colts tanking intentionally. 

If either (or both) teams actually consider Kaepernick, I hope he goes to the Texans. The Colts' owner is a douchebag.

I'll be very surprised if the Browns or 49ers win a game at all this year. Too bad they don't play each other. The game could be dubbed the Toilet Bowl.

Will also be very surprised if the Eagles don't lose at least one more game.

Edited by Brian Floyd on 02 November 2017 at 7:50pm
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Matt Reed
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Joined: 16 April 2004
Posts: 32807
Posted: 02 November 2017 at 11:56pm | IP Logged | 5 post reply

Watson is out.  100%. Not coming back.  So it's the Jags division to lose. The Titans could (and will) fight for it, but I really don't have any faith in that squad. The Colts and Texans are out.

Although the Colts owner is a douchebag, the Texans owner ain't that much better.  "Can't let the inmates run the asylum"?  C'mon.

Both the Browns and the Niners will win a game, maybe two, this season.  Neither is as bad as that Lions team that went 0-16.  Some team will come in feeling overconfident and the winless team will shock the world...for an hour.  

And the Vikes are the best team in the NFC North.  SKOL VIKINGS!!!!!
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Kevin Hagerman
Byrne Robotics Member

Joined: 15 April 2005
Location: United States
Posts: 17216
Posted: 03 November 2017 at 8:43pm | IP Logged | 6 post reply

Imagine what the Texans would be like if Watt and Watson were there all year...
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Karl Wiebe
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Joined: 06 December 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 169
Posted: 24 November 2017 at 10:26pm | IP Logged | 7 post reply

I could not believe the Chargers continue to win despit not having a functioning kicker.  I hate crappy coaching.  How do you have a 50-plus roster and no one else on the squad can kick an extra point. 

I enjoy watching the Patriots play because they always seem to be the best coached team.  They just never seem to make a bone-headed mistake.  With an average team, they are as scary as a highly-talented "normal" team!
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John Popa
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Joined: 20 March 2008
Posts: 3209
Posted: 25 November 2017 at 12:19pm | IP Logged | 8 post reply

This is a pretty funny article showing that mathematically speaking, the Browns are still not eliminated from play-off contention. hances-of-making-the-playoffs-are-only-1-in-19-quintillion/
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