I'll go with J.K. Rowling. Women are the ones who menstruate. 

The rest are guys who like to crossdress or have got psychological identity problems and should stay out of women's restrooms.

I'd expect, as a cis-male, that I could go to a salon and have my legs waxed. *shrug* It's not a service I see offered at barbers.

The vandalism was wrong. Extreme behavior on the part of a set of activists still doesn't disqualify activism.

The shelter's argument that they can only provide services to women "born female" doesn't seem to hold up. If the argument is that cis women would be uncomfortable with a trans woman with masculine traits, what about a cis-passing trans woman? If the argument is that trans women are different because they benefitted from male privilege, what about trans women who identified young, started presenting themselves as female young, and received puberty blockers and never developed male secondary characteristics?

Not all genetic women menstruate - hysterectomies, menopause, etc.

Marc

To be crude for a moment, if I chopped off your dick and balls right now, would you immediately cease identifying as a male? What if I transferred your brain into a robot body? Would you cease identifying as male?

Is your gender identity defined by your genitals or by your brain? If you can accept that is defined by your brain, what determines whether your brain is male or female? Hormones. There's a ton of literature on how "masculine" and "feminine" traits are determined by exposure to hormones in the prenatal, uterine environment. If we can accept that the brain can be gendered prenatally, would it be possible that there might be a mismatch between one's gendered brain and one's anatomy?

And circling back, if all the above is the case, should we be acknowledging people by their innate identity or their external anatomical characteristics?

The moment I did it, I knew I'd regret it.

Controversial, I know.

——-

Except there are such things as XY females and XX males and XXY males...

But since we're talking about it, it's okay to admit that not all trans people are the same. Some will spend a ton of money and effort in order to pass, and they have no problem going in women's restrooms. Your daughter won't even realize that the lady in question is trans (but, but... the chromossomes!). Some trans people will not spend all that money transitioning, and that's okay, that's their choice (and when we're talking about hormones and surgeries it is a choice), but the world will not treat them the same way, not only in restrooms but everywhere. It is okay to admit that and to understand that a frightened woman will not care about the way you feel or what you know about yourself.

People are afraid and the answer is not to simply tell them to stop being afraid. A lot has to change for people to lose their fear.

Now, the interesting question is: should lesbians, in general, have sex with trans women who didn't get bottom surgery?